My dilemma: SAHM or WOHM

I will start this by saying that I don’t think either of the two situations is better than the other; all parents have a unique set of circumstances that drive them to choose one over the other, and I genuinely believe that in the end we make the “right” decision for our families. That said, my only experience as a SAHM (stay at home mom) has been when I gave birth to my first child in 1997, I was home with her for approximately 6-7 months and unfortunately “had” to work due to our financial situation. Since then I have been home for a couple months at a time after giving birth to my subsequent children, and my return to work after maternity leave has been more difficult each time. In theory, I would LOVE to be home with my children, and do all the things SAHM’s do, like going on field trips, participating in school events, driving everyone to soccer practice, having dinner ready every night, scrapbooking (I have tons of scrapbooking materials sitting in a box in the garage) and everything else you can do as a SAHM! My dilemma lies in not having the financial resources to do all the “other” things I would like my family to experience, I love taking trips to Disney and Mexico every year, eating out at nice fancy restaurants, going shopping when one of my girls has a really bad day at school etc.; and then there are the things I don’t want to give up, like Starbucks, shopping, shopping, and shopping! I know, it’s all me and I’m selfish but I can’t help it and honestly, I don’t know if we could make it financially even without the extras I listed above. I’m jealous of those whose spouses are rolling in the big bucks so they don’t have to work, unfortunately for me that’s not going to happen anytime soon. I don’t blame my husband; I have just become accustomed to a somewhat materialistic lifestyle that I know I shouldn't have. Every time I’m on maternity leave I try to live like a SAHM to see if I can handle it, but I end up spending way much more because I have more time to eat out, shop and just spend! Seriously, I would LOVE to be home with my children, but I also like being independent, feeling accomplished, and having a job that I LOVE. I torment myself everyday for making the decision to continue to work and maybe one day I will eventually decide to be a SAHM but for now I just pray that this won’t be one of the things I regret most in life.